You Were Murdered. The Killer? … You.

Insight 56 | The yellow tape surrounds an oddly ordinary-looking scene.

Perhaps it's a cubicle, corner office, home studio, track, meeting room, zoom call, stage, or classroom (fill in your field's choice of enclosure here).

The Weapon: Your misaligned ambition. It lies next to the victim, dull from its repetitive use. 

Collateral Damage: Broken relationships and lost time, sprinkled in fractured shards around the motionless body.

The Motive: Unclear. Current theories suggest that the victim died trying to prove themselves to themselves, or that an accident occurred while chasing someone else’s elusive dreams. 

The Investigation: Ongoing. Confirmed facts include:

• The victim forgot how beautiful life could be.

• The victim lost sight of their purpose.

• The death was slow and gradual. The victim was likely unaware of what was happening.

It didn’t, doesn't have to be this way.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize for the somewhat gruesome introduction, but I had to get your attention, because it's true. We are dying.

Dying to grow up.

Dying to run away

Dying to be someone we're not.

And it's killing you, isn't it? This feeling of always having to step up to the plate, outperform yourself, or simply “survive” the current season in hopes of a better next one?

Many of us live our lives running from one place to another or avoiding what we should be doing, leading to us dying to…

• Earn a degree, prove them wrong, and deal with the anxiety.

• Meet the “one”, date, then marry, and raise a family.

• Impress our boss, get the promotion, climb the corporate ladder, and maybe own the company.

• Finish the bucket list, travel the world, not die young, and leave somewhat of a legacy.

Please hear me clearly when I say these are good things, but they become a poison if they're all we live for. If they cause us to lose sight of our real purpose and miss what's right in front of us, then they are not dreams but nightmares.

We so easily forget that with this mentality, at this hurried pace, one day we will reach the end of the road and have worried more than laughed, cried in sadness more often than in joy, and screamed in fear more than in glee. This observation is not meant to be a morbid commentary but rather a reflective thought: 

In trying to reach the next season of life, you might be missing the one you're in.

It hurts to write that because it's a message just as much for me as for anyone else. I will be the first to admit that I can be too quick to pursue all the dreams bubbling up in my heart while forgetting to enjoy the dream I'm living. Yes, I understand that it might not always look like one, but the fact that you are even reading this indicates you are likely blessed to a degree above what many others experience.

The question then becomes, how do we stop killing ourselves over the things that don’t matter? How do we live unhurried, at peace, and with intention? While there are many aspects to this, such as not losing sight of YOUR blessing and making time for what “actually matters,”  I believe it all comes back to a simple thought:

Stop and smell the roses. 

If you don’t think you have the time to do this, stop right there and realize that if you somehow find the time to worry, stress, and chase meaningless clout, then surely you have the time to enjoy, laugh, and pursue purpose. Beyond this, the truth is we all make time for what matters. All this proposition entails is exchanging some of the time currently dedicated to those life-draining activities for those of the life-giving kind.

To start, what if we stopped stressing about work when we're at home and missing home when we're at work?

How about we stop thinking about vacation when stressed, and about all the stress piling up when on vacation? What if we enjoy singleness when single and marriage when married, college when in college, and corporate when in corporate?

Imagine permitting ourselves to experience satisfaction and contentment with the work we have completed. This season. This harvest. This breath.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die… That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. - Ecclesiastes 3: 1-2 & 13

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It’s true, none of us are getting out of this life alive, but there's no need to kill yourself along the way. What if your life, instead of looking like the crime scene described earlier, when your time to depart this earth did come, looked like a tombstone that reads:

Here lies someone who lived every day with purpose and intention

Gave their everything to everything they did.

And was present in each moment, living life to the fullest.

We’re living the good ole days, friends. DON’T BE A SKIPPER and try to fast forward to the next season. Being present in the current moment is a gift. Raise a few glasses along the way, smell the roses, and toast to the beauty that is. 

Action Step: Stop dying to live and instead live life till you're dead. 

- Making The Most Of Being Curious

Daniel J. Cuesta

Sources:

Remember There Is A Season: “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:  a time to be born and a time to die.” - Ecclesiastes 3:1-2

The Danger of Misaligned Ambition: “For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.” - James 3:16  (This is why Godly ambition is so crucial)

The Deception of Chasing the World: “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?” - Matthew 16:26

The Call to Contentment: “But godliness with contentment is great gain… If we have food and clothing, we will be content with that”  1 Timothy 6:6-8